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 No.1229798[Last 50 Posts]

I REALLY HAVE TO TAKE A SHIT

 No.1229952

don't do it

 No.1229957

poo in stret budy

 No.1229964

not op but just pood

 No.1229969

checking in

 No.1230815

literally me right now

 No.1231181

my ass is beirut now

 No.1231282

gunna take a week to recover from that one

 No.1231587

brb

 No.1231661

i poopd my pant

 No.1233294

not an indian but just pood on the street

 No.1233446

poo in the pantsu

 No.1233567

shippy da poo wop

 No.1234323

just did it

 No.1234324

nah

 No.1234337

retaining (holding in) your feces (shit) gives you superpowers (special abilities)

 No.1234347

File: 1598021255670.jpg (240.99 KB, 787x1200, 787:1200, 6091216-8863281105-lxlbc.jpg)

>>1234337
I did this the other day and I totally went Super Saiyan on the toilet when I finally did go

 No.1234997

File: 1598090192067.jpg (21.76 KB, 1045x997, 1045:997, orig.jpg)

To take a dump, or not to dump, that is the question

 No.1235439

oops i shitted

 No.1235476

>>1235439
me 2 budy

 No.1236157

fucking stinks of rotting fish assholes

 No.1237098

forgive me father for i have sinned

 No.1237118

did a p good shit on period piss gf left in toilet

 No.1237187

>>1237118
period piss is best piss

 No.1238746

british queen

 No.1239290

bwoah

 No.1240200

I'm gunna blow some SHIT out of my ASS
RIGHT NOW

 No.1240328

bout to lay a king kong finger

 No.1240419

FUCKKKKKK IM TAKING A SHIT AND MY KOT ATE THE TOILET PAPER WHAT A BITCH

 No.1240427

File: 1598899171265.jpg (14.71 KB, 280x280, 1:1, story_half_width.jpg)

>>1240419
it's telling you it wants you to wipe with it

 No.1240642

ALRIGHT LETS DO THIS

 No.1240674

>>1240642
Not bad, but I've seen better.

 No.1240890

File: 1598938178818.jpg (205.49 KB, 1075x1394, 1075:1394, 1598935829585.jpg)

I wish she would poop on me.

 No.1240899

bout to pull a holdo maneuver on this porcelain

 No.1240958

getting fucked in the ass feels like shitting backwards

 No.1240959

>>1240958
what does shitting backwards feel like then?

 No.1240962

>>1240959
20 dead at mcdonalds

 No.1240963

>>1240962
21 including the shooter*

 No.1240998

>>1240959
getting fucked in the ass, obviously

 No.1241022

>>1240962
james huberty was a p cool guy tbh

 No.1241486

>>1240998
oh okay I know what that feels like

 No.1241489

>>1241022
pastor anderson said killing mexicans at a mcdonalds is a sin

 No.1241830

>>1241489
pastor Anderson says a lot of things

 No.1241856

i definitely feel a bit of a log coming any time now

 No.1242298

I still can't sleep

 No.1242302

have a beer
it's already after breakfast mountain time

 No.1242309

я посрал

 No.1242311

I AM BECOME POO, DESTROYER OF LOOS

 No.1243073

brb logging out

 No.1243081

I am tired of pissing

 No.1243239

brb

 No.1243462

ALL FART AND NO SHIT

 No.1243475

held it in for about 3 days and just had the most satisfying shit of my life

 No.1243543

File: 1599286685414-0.png (550.72 KB, 818x700, 409:350, ClipboardImage.png)

File: 1599286685414-1.png (420.64 KB, 832x600, 104:75, ClipboardImage.png)

This smart toilet can read your anus like a fingerprint, say scientists
>Stanford researchers are developing a smart toilet that uses biometrics to identify people's butts and analyze their poop.
>The toilet is meant to detect "a range of disease markers in stool and urine" including multiple types of cancer.
>It's been tested on 21 people. Researchers also surveyed 300 prospective users, and roughly half said they were comfortable with the idea.

 No.1243544

File: 1599286772578-0.png (390.5 KB, 812x631, 812:631, ClipboardImage.png)

File: 1599286772578-1.png (436.56 KB, 820x663, 820:663, ClipboardImage.png)

File: 1599286772578-2.png (300.55 KB, 795x600, 53:40, ClipboardImage.png)


 No.1243553

File: 1599288448732.png (47.11 KB, 202x171, 202:171, ClipboardImage.png)

>>1243544
>>1243543
>smart toilet, i bet those geniuses at stanford really OH WOW IT'S A FUCKING CAMERA IN A SHITTER

 No.1243555

>>1243553
algorithms & bhole biometrics dawg

 No.1243570

>>1243543
perparing a stool sample is disgusting so something like this sure makes things easy, though only if they analyze shit, what's this about anusprints? Ew.

 No.1243593

>>1243555
I'd just like to interject for a moment…What you're referring to as bhole biometrics is in fact based on a Free Software called GNU Asshole Indicator (GNU AI).

Many computer users run a modified version of GNU AI every day,
without realizing it. Through a peculiar turn of events, the version of GNU AI
which is widely used today is often called "iOS".

 No.1243656

File: 1599326340130.jpg (61.85 KB, 637x470, 637:470, EhJq6BvVkAEIKCT.jpg)

She came, she sat, she poopd.

 No.1243690


 No.1243698

Every morning I wake up in the same day. Every day I do the same thing and go to sleep, there is no escape from this eternal plain of existence.

 No.1243716

>>1243698
just do something different

 No.1243725

>>1243593
woah. what does iOS stand for?

 No.1243898

post the one of that girl squatting to shit and some incel rubs her puzzy.

 No.1243899

>>1243725
Internet of stuff

 No.1243901

>>1243475
I'm having the opposite experience
I can tell there's a waterfall of shit just waiting yet I just let out the skinniest pencil of a poo
I JUST WANT IT OUT OF ME DAMNIT

 No.1243936

>>1243901
try magnesium yet? always good poops

 No.1244193

>>1243901
i ate 1 cup of oatmeal every morning, i recommend that but it's only for experts because oatmeal will make you want to shit real bad

 No.1244227

holy FUCK I'm rabid right now
just experienced the worst complimentary breakfast of my life
this is fucking tryanny they used covid as an excuse to only serve shitty cereal boxes and milk cartons
THEY DISNT EVEN HAVE ANY FUCKING DANISHES

 No.1244240

>>1244227
burrclaws are baaaaaaaaad

 No.1244630

>>1244240
I've been drinking
shut up
Biiiiitch

 No.1244649

File: 1599444296777.jpg (49.14 KB, 700x394, 350:197, awoken.jpg)

gettin turned down by hotel clerks: nothin
norf pussy: nothin
no upgrade on a 6 hour flight: nothin
shitty complimentary breakfast: picrel

 No.1244667

ALL SHIT AND NO FART

 No.1244669

>>1244667
that sounds dangerous

 No.1244670

>>1244227
just call them racist and the NAACP will sue them for you

 No.1244697

File: 1599460459878.mp4 (6.57 MB, 1280x720, 16:9, portlel.mp4)

omw to shit for nigger lives

 No.1244705

poopy for a rupee

 No.1244730

>>1244697
policedude should have let him burn

 No.1244732

AN IF YOU AIN'T A HO GET UP OUT MY TRAP HOUSE

 No.1244739

the calm benevolent silence before the morning shit urges begin rests upon the dew of my conscious, tickled by the sunny rays of a pending need to piss

 No.1244741

>>1244697
what do you call those dance moves

 No.1244780

File: 1599490283746.mp4 (10.81 MB, 1280x720, 16:9, cotton.mp4)


 No.1244823

Day 2: Gf got super fucking drunk and obnoxious, had to babysit her all night and I ended up missing complimentary breakfast altogether
FUCK.

 No.1244834

>>1244823
where are you vacationing sweetie?

 No.1244840

пиздец оно воняет

 No.1244891

>>1244823
you cant allow that
tell her such behaviour demonstrates she cant be trusted with her own drinking and from now on she will have to ask for your explicit permission. then give her a good spanking to reinforce the lesson. dont stop until her buttocks are deep red
you can thank me later

 No.1244906

File: 1599506128686.jpg (60.31 KB, 1000x562, 500:281, miralax-cranky-pated-large….jpg)


 No.1245213

Hello World!

 No.1245257

>>1245213
helo budy
yu lik criket?

 No.1245271

take poo to the loo

 No.1245272

poo poo in her pantsu

 No.1245293

a little shitty ditty

 No.1245427


 No.1245431


 No.1245841

it's time

 No.1246578

like pacman throwing up tic tacs

 No.1246592

im actually shitting myself rn

 No.1247397

i did a puwu

 No.1247859

it is time

 No.1249145

im sowwy i shidded daddy

 No.1250380

i made an oopsie woopsie

 No.1250664

HOLY SHIT

 No.1250697

i haves iwwitable bowel syndrome *nuzzles my sheets*

 No.1250959

time to clap those cheeks and make a brown baby boy

 No.1251800

OH NO NO NO NO NO

 No.1253816

someone took a shit and didn’t flush i hate this place I think im gonna throw up

 No.1253859

File: 1600703259527.png (193.27 KB, 646x508, 323:254, ClipboardImage.png)

>>1253816
heh wait till you see the men's room on /h/
goulash and franzia sundays i tell ya

 No.1253867


 No.1253868

>>1253867
how many times do you have to get drilled before you can suck air into your ass

 No.1253869


 No.1253871

>>1253869
questionable age goatbro but she is flexible. is this a good regime to follow?



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